Can I teach myself to be ambidextrous?
It can be really difficult to write an honest and transparent blog about the struggles I have as a TBI survivor and more recently debilitating wrist injury without going too deep into a “woe is me” tone. 2024 has definitely been a struggle bus for me personally and professionally.
Wrist update
Two weeks ago I received a cortisone shot to help relieve the trauma tendinitis. It has worked somewhat, although I can still feel that area is sensitive. The result of the reduction in that swelling and dominant pain is that I can now feel the rest of the areas of my hand that are still injured.
To clarify what I am talking about January 26th, 2023 I was driving to a vendor. There was a red light and no extended merge area for a right hand turn. So I came to a stop, craned by body and neck to see if there was oncoming traffic and someone drove into my truck. This ramp is coming off a 60mph freeway that most folks drive 70-80. I have driven it many times since and often I come into that turn at 20-30. So it wasn’t just a tap.
It’s really something to have your dominant wrist non functional and in pain. Since I was able to pick up a crayon, art and expressing myself has been my go to. My curiosity — what would happen if… has been driving force behind my art career and hobbies. For me that curiosity is to see if something works. Once in a blue moon there’s success from the get go. Most often it doesn’t match what I had imagined. So then the process of finding a solution comes in. With art it becomes a process of question and answer between my brain and hands until a solution is found.
how to make blueberries taste blueberry?
A more relatable example is baking. I wanted to make a dairy free blueberry cookie with alternate flours that both looked and tasted blueberry. So as my therapist says I would put on my investigators cap, make a base dough alternating white sugar for Demerara or turbinado sugar, switching out white flour for a ratio of white to finely ground almond flour and made my base dough. I then made about 12 sample cookie’s combining blueberry and other flavors such as lemon and cinnamon. I ground up freeze dried blueberries, had dried blueberries, blueberry flavoring (which I prefer not to use except as a teeny bit if necessary). I baked my tests, ate a small sample of each, took notes and reformulated. The end cookie had ground freeze dried blueberries as an additional flour component for taste and color, chopped dried blueberries, a hint of cinnamon, and a whisper of blueberry extract.
This endeavor made me think about what I was really wanting to do with my baked goods. I was thinking of Norway’s love of fruit and nuts. So what if I use nut oils as a fat content, and a combination of ground nuts and ground freeze dried fruits to build my cookies? I haven’t tried most of the combinations I dreamt of, but there is a list waiting for me.
Can you train yourself to become ambidextrous?
my curiosity
As the days are getting longer and flowers begin to bloom I think this curiosity is the solution for my double disability that has choked me up. When I got sober and would be whining about all the problems I had, my incredible sponsor would tell me to find solutions. Always look for solutions. My therapist and I will talk about hooks (self pity in this case) that latch on and take up valuable real estate in the mind.
I realize that my anger at not being able to work with clay, pour molds, lift things heavier than a gallon of milk has made me so resentful of my wrists betrayal that I haven’t been able to move out of my anger and into acceptance. It is possible that years down the road my hand will heal up with time and who knows how many more cortisone shots. But, there’s a strong possibility that this is my new wrist.
I can and do acknowledge that this situation is the worst nightmare for a ceramic artist. But what I need to start focusing on are solutions. What CAN I do with my wrist?
With my TBI I learned that I need to take frequent breaks to let my brain rest until it’s ready to pick up the tasks. What if my wrist needs the same? I listen to a lot of audiobooks, what if my break is going on a walk and listening instead of lying down? What if *gasp* I see if I can train myself to be ambidextrous? Much of my extended family are lefties and in clay I use my left hand more than my right for certain tasks.
I am continually learning new information— painting horizontally is less painful than painting vertical. Instead of viewing it as a continued betrayal of my beloved hand, maybe I should consider it a valuable building block to build my new creative life with?